Life Issues Most Commonly Treated
Alcohol/Drug Dependency Intervention and Recovery
Many families are deeply impacted by addiction. Whether a person becomes concerned about her/his own level of substance use/abuse, or family and friends are distraught over the self-destructive behavior of a loved one, help and hope are available here at the Center. Several of our therapists have not only specialized skills, but personal experience with the devastating effects of drug & alcohol abuse and dependency. Family members can also receive help with codependency and coping issues. We have an Interventionist on staff who can facilitate a compassionate and effective intervention to move an addict/alcoholic into treatment and recovery.
Anger Management
When fear and high anxiety reach violent proportions someone will be hurt. Rage, shame, guilt and anger have strong alliance in emotional and physical expressions of anger. Anger on one hand, can be a creative alert that something is wrong. Once it is projected onto another human being, as a justification for perceived wrong, the creative side disappears altogether. Our society needs a new model for understanding anger. Road rage is epidemic. Household abuse, child abuse, and particularly verbal abuse are becoming increasingly common currencies in relationships. “Anger management” is a term used for persons who are experiencing difficulty in managing their anger are on the borderline of abuse.
Blended Families
To have a measure of success in the blended family takes concerted work and frequently intentional therapy. Baggage from past relationships is difficult to deal with in human affairs. Helping the blended family to identify these issues and grow through them into mutual respect are a part of a process that the Center understands and which constitutes a major concern.
Children’s Issues
Only in recent history have children been valued for who they are. We are now in a period of our history when many children are the objects of abuse, and where we lack family systems that are conducive to rearing our young to become responsible and caring adults. Frequently the “identified patients,” children often are reflections of the unresolved issues that families bring to counseling. Click here to read a pastoral letter from the Bishops of the Episcopal Church regarding children and the church.
Depression
Everybody feels sad or “blue” occasionally, but if the feeling persists for two weeks or more, you may be suffering from depression. Persons suffering from depression may have difficulty concentrating, feel more tired than usual, have trouble sleeping, eat more or less than usual, lose pleasure in things they used to enjoy or have feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness. Depression is a real illness with identifiable symptoms and causes. It may be caused by an imbalance of naturally occurring chemicals in the body and may be triggered by severe stress, such as chronic overwork, divorce, job loss, or death of a loved one.
http://my.webmd.com/medical_information/condition_centers/depression/default.htm
Divorce/Divorce Recovery/Separation
There are two kinds of separation and divorce. The one most couples are aware of is the legal aspect of separation and divorce. The unconscious emotional separation and divorce is the second one. Men and women who have achieved low levels of developmental separation from their parents and experience great difficulty in handling of the husband/wife role will promote the role of parent into a position of emotional priority relative to the role of spouse. This means that some troubled spouses will obscure their “emotional divorce” by acting dominantly in the role of parent. This parent-child relationship leaves little time for marital concerns. And, job demand dominance leaves little time for marital concerns as well.
Either “divorce” when traveled alone, inflicts injury and wounds that have immediate and long term consequences. A recovery from divorce and a recovery toward divorce healing will help prevent generational consequences of repeating the legal and emotional divorce patterns. If unattended, the second marriage may not be strong enough to carry the continuing unresolved issues. If unattended, the current marriage may be long but will be endured in some form with quiet and not so quiet suffering and desperation.
Elderly & Retirement
Living on a fixed income, the loss of a spouse or partner, declining health, changing societal mores, moving into a retirement facility, relating to grown children who have their own lives to live, depression, Alzheimer’s or senile dementia, decline in activity, loss of friends. The Center is sensitive in responding to these and other problems that confront the elderly and those facing retirement. Depression frequently accompanies many of these issues and will be responded to with appropriate treatment.
End of Life Decisions
The prayer, “God, help me to be fully alive when I die,” reflects our human awareness that life is a gift for which we are called to exercise careful stewardship-even at its end. It is often observed that we die the way we live, but we also have important choices to make about the quality of our final days and what we wish for our loved ones. Health care providers, counselors, and spiritual directors are increasingly sensitive to the spiritual and theological dimensions of the end of life. There are also practical spiritual and theological considerations, such as Advance Directives (Living Wills and Durable Power of Attorney for Healthcare) and treatment and pain management options. All of these concerns may be addressed in a trusted counseling relationship that can help to hold the myriad of feelings that emerge as the end of life approaches for oneself or for loved ones.
Suggested reading:Handbook for Mortals: Guidance for People Facing Serious Illness
, by Joanne Lynn, MD and Joan Harrold, MD and the Center to Improve Care of the Dying. New Your” Oxford University Press, 1999.
Peaceful Dying ” The Step-By-Step Guide to Preserving Your Dignity, Your Choice, and Your Inner Peace at the End of Life, by Daniel R. Tobin, MD. Reading, Mass.: Perseus Books, 1999.
Marriage and Family
Marriage and family can be the source of profound joy or they can be the origin of intense pain and suffering. The heart of marriage is a committed relationship that evokes trust and acceptance, where two people share growth and mutual affection. Marriage is the primary relationship, one to which children can bring great happiness; but children also bring more responsibility to the marriage. Proper boundaries, respect, understanding and mutuality are essential for a wise balance to be maintained and for trust to emerge as a way of being family.
Premarital Counseling
In the United States half of all marriages fail. Premarital counseling can help get your marriage off to a good start by helping you understand how experiences in your family of origin affect your assumptions about marriage, how you communicate and how you relate to each other. With effective premarital counseling you will identify and build on your strengths as a couple, as well as recognize areas of your relationship that may be problematic. You will learn new skills, gain new insights, and develop new empathy for each other.
Suggested Reading:
Keeping the Love You Find, Giving the Love that Heals and other books by Harville Hendrix
A Lasting Promise, Fighting for Your Marriage and other books by Scott Stanley
http://www.wedalert.com/content/articles/premarital_counseling.asp
Spiritual Direction & Religious Issues
One of the offerings of the Center is spiritual direction, or spiritual guidance. It is difficult for us to know always where the Spirit of God is leading us, and sometimes we need another one skilled in spiritual development and spiritual formation to walk with us as we explore new possibilities. Spiritual direction and guidance are usually regular and ongoing processes at the Center. The times and conditions of the meetings are between the guide and the client. Spiritual direction and guidance are frequently a life-changing experience.
As a client put it recently: “There is a sacred element in the exchange and that is what makes the difference. I have felt the holy so powerfully it is like unleashed electricity filling the room, and I have felt it so gently it is like the memory of a soft touch. This changes people….” This client also refers to the gift of spiritual direction as the “gift of possibility.” (Quote used with client’s permission).
Women’s issues
Women constantly live transitional lives. Childbirth, marriage, being single, divorce, care-giving, careers, illness and other stressors cause our lives to take new directions again and again. Women juggle multiple roles and this can be difficult and confusing. The last several decades in America have been marked by radical and thorough-going changes in the place of women in our society. Stress can arise from these transitions and it is important to “work through” these stages of growth in order to become a more “complete person.”
